#the great divide such cute song but listen to it in spanish

[neytui]

I never guessed how close you were to me 🧚‍♀️❄

[shinsorokiri]

UA Idol | Chapter Twenty

Hitoshi Shinsou x Reader

Word Count: 3,079

Warnings: Language, excessive amounts of nerves, Y/n’s song mentions a razor

A/N: Another one. This one was fun and now I’m excited because we are getting into live shows which means a LOT OF ACTION IS ABOUT TO GO DOWN LEMME TELL YOU. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this one! I’m having fun with this series and I have a few ideas for some other ones, so if anyone would be interested in hearing about them just let me know and I’ll post little prefaces or something. Okay, I’ll shut up now, please enjoy! :)

───────────────────────────────────

“Are you ready to kick some ass?!” Mina screams as the two of you are getting dressed for your final performances of Hell Week. You laugh a bit, shaking your head. “Yeah, I’m ready. I’m assuming you’re even more ready considering you just screamed that at six in the morning.”

“Oh, you know I’m ready. I’m so pumped, dude. So. Pumped.”

“I can tell.”

“And you need to calm down, (Y/n), I can tell you’re nervous.”

“I’m always nervous, Mina. Especially with this.”

“Yeah, well you’re gonna kill it and get through to live shows with absolutely no problem, so I don’t wanna hear it,” Mina winks at you as she applies her lipstick, and you grin. It’s nice knowing your best friend has more faith in you than you do. You freshen up, making yourself look presentable. You’re wearing the best outfit you brought here, and to say you look good is an understatement. “Someone looks hot,” Mina says as the two of you are about to leave. You laugh. “Speak for yourself,” you say, and she just stops in the middle of the hallway and starts twerking and doing tiktok dances. All because you said she looked hot and she’s extra as hell. You can only roll your eyes as you laugh, and surprisingly while she’s doing this, Uraraka runs over to you guys and joins in with her. “Oh my god y’all, let’s go,” you say through laughter, rushing over to the elevator and hitting the button. 

Uraraka and Mina both follow after you the minute they hear the doors ding, opening up to reveal Midoriya and Todoroki. “Hey guys!” Uraraka says, hugging Midoriya. Todoroki and Midoriya both greet everyone and you all start talking about the performances. “I’m so nervous,” Midoriya says, and Todoroki tries to inconspicuously grab his hand to give him reassurance, but you all see it. None of you say anything though because it’s cute. “I am too, dude,” you say, and Mina hits both of you. Not like actually hits but a friend smack on the arm. “You two need to stop this, you’re going to do great!” “I agree with Mina, you’re both going to be just fine,” Todoroki says, and Midoriya starts grinning like a mad man. “But it’s okay to be nervous, just know that y’all are going to kill it and everything will be fine!” Uraraka says, giving you both a thumbs up. By the end of the elevator ride, you feel a little better with what’s about to happen. When you all walk out into the lobby where you run into Hitoshi and Denki. “Hey guys,” Mina says, running over to Denki and bumping him with her butt. She is… very energetic for getting up extremely early. Denki laughs and butt bumps her back. The two of them have the most chaotic energy you’ve ever seen in two people. It’s kind of impressive. 

“Hey,” you say to Hitoshi and he grins. “Hey.”

Unbeknownst to you, he had been checking you OUT the minute you stepped off of that elevator. He knows you’re insanely attractive and he’s seen you look good countless of times but like… wow. Right now, you look insanely good, and he can’t even try to hide the fact that he was looking you up and down. Of course, Todoroki noticed this, and made a mental note to text in the group about what he just saw. But later. When you two weren’t around. 

“Alright guys let’s head out!” Denki screams the minute that Kirishima, Bakugou, and Sero step out of the elevator and Momo and Jirou appear from the stairs. Now you all could walk to the theater, it truthfully wasn’t that far, but UA Idol provided the contestants with big ass vans just like they did for the first round of Hell Week. You pile in one with Mina, Denki, Hitoshi, Kirishima, and Bakugou yet again, but this time the conversation is a lot more familiar and Bakugou even partakes in it without calling someone a dumbass in every sentence. 

The drive really was short, so you just stared out of the window the whole time. You were listening to what was happening and responding with laughs and things, but you weren’t necessarily talking. You were just going over the lyrics of your song in your head and trying not to psych yourself out. Hitoshi knows this, of course, and he gently hits you with his foot, causing you to look at him. “You okay?” he mouths, concern evident on his features. You nod, and he raises an eyebrow at you. You give him a small grin, trying to convince him that you were fine because you really were, you were just nervous. But he doesn’t buy it and decides that he’ll ask you about it when the two of you are alone. And Kirishima notices this exchange, but he also bookmarks it in his brain to talk about in the group chat later as well. 

When your van pulls up to the theater, you all hop out and head inside. Everyone is gathering in the actual theater again, and you all head in. This time, you’re sitting with all of your new friends instead of just Hitoshi since you aren’t divided up into genres this time, but of course you were still right next to him. “Okay, seriously, what’s up?” you hear a whisper and look over to see Hitoshi highkey concerned about you. You smile a bit. Cute. “I’m just nervous Toshi, it’s okay,” you respond, and he frowns. “I wish I could help you out with that but like, same.”

“I knew you’d feel my pain. But don’t worry, you’re going to do great.”

“And you are too, kitten.”

He elbows you, causing you to smile. Now you didn’t feel 100% confident after this, but you did certainly feel a lot better. When all forty of the remaining contestants are gathered in the theater, everyone is informed on what is about to go down. The theater is where everyone will wait and watch the performances on a big screen, but since they’re in LA and it’s a really nice day, a separate performance stage was set up outside. Everyone will be doing another soundcheck before the performances, since they’re changing from indoors to outside, and they will start at two pm. It seems a little early, but the way they do this is they have everyone perform for a live audience which usually takes around three and a half hours. Then, they need to discuss who will go through and who won’t, which can take anywhere between an hour to two hours. Then, they proceed to invite everyone back onto the stage outside where the judges are going to be sitting to tell them if they’re going through to the live shows, or if they’re going home. 

After that, you all get to work immediately. Everyone heads out to the outdoor stage, running through soundcheck again and adjusting to the new dynamics of outside. You would be lying if you said you weren’t also pumped as well as nervous. This was about to be so fun, but also extremely important for your future. Before you knew it, it was two, and there were so many people in the crowd. You all watched from inside the theater on a big screen on the stage, and you hear Sero mutter something in Spanish while Denki and Mina’s jaws drop. “That… is a lot of people,” Midoriya says, his nerves evident in the shake of his voice and look of fear in his eyes. “Yeah, but who cares? If they’re here to hear good music and watch a good fucking performance that’s what they’re gonna get. Don’t let a shit ton of strangers make you perform like shit, Deku,” Bakugou growls at Midoriya. He’d started calling him Deku ever since yesterday when he saw how clumsy the poor kid was. It’s not a very endearing nickname, but it’s certainly a degrading one. Midoriya doesn’t seem to mind though, and in retaliation started calling him Kaachan. Don’t ask why, no one really knows, but it makes Bakugou’s blood boil. “He kind of has a point, you know,” Uraraka says as the first contestants start going. “I mean, they’re here. For a good performance. So that’s what we’ll give them!”

You take a deep breath, trying to listen to Bakugou and Uraraka, but still internally freaking out a little bit. Everyone going so far had been really good, you have no idea how the judges can pick people to send to the next round and who to get rid of. You would never be able to do that. You watched as all of your friends, old and new, went, occasionally going to sing backup for them. For some unknown reason, basically all of you were the last one to go. Kirishima and Denki helped Bakugou sing the background vocals for his song, Sugar, We’re Goin Down by Fall Out Boy and then Kirishima and Bakugou in turn helped Denki with his rendition of No Control by One Direction. Meanwhile with Kirishima, he had quite a few people helping him out since he’s singing Locked out of Heaven by Bruno Mars, but all of them had amazing performances. Mina, of course, killed her performance of Positions by Ariana Grande as well as Uraraka with her performance of New Rules by Dua Lipa. Sero completely and totally caught everyone off guard singing a Caramelo by Ozuna, mainly because a lot of people didn’t realize he was Asian Latino and fluent in Spanish, Japanese, and English. Of course, you all knew because you hung out with him like all day yesterday and he threatened to beat Bakugou with a shoe completely in Spanish which was hilarious because Bakugou didn’t know what was going on, but a lot of people (excluding the judges since they saw him literally audition in Mexico) were surprised. Midoriya did a surprisingly good cover of Dance Monkey by the Tones and I and Todoroki really did a great job singing Willow by Taylor Swift. Mans has range. And now, Hitoshi was up. You gave him a thumbs up when he looked back at you at the piano, which was a decision you both made so you could since back-up and also play the piano, it made sense to do and was easier on the pianist in the band. He could learn one less song. Then he started strumming his ukulele and went off.

“I was scared of dentists and the dark. I was scared of pretty girls and starting conversations, Oh, all my friends are turning green. You're the magician's assistant in their dream.

Ah-ooh-ooh-ooh, ah-ahh-ah-ah And they come unstuck…

Lady, running down to the riptide, Taken away to the dark side, I wanna be your left-hand man. I love you when you're singing that song, And I got a lump in my throat 'Cause you're gonna sing the words wrong.

There's this movie that I think you'll like. This guy decides to quit his job and heads to New York City. This cowboy's running from himself, And she's been living on the highest shelf.

Ah-ooh-ooh-ooh, ah-ahh-oh And they come unstuck…

Lady, running down to the riptide, Taken away to the dark side, I wanna be your left-hand man. I love you when you're singing that song. And I got a lump in my throat 'Cause you're gonna sing the words wrong.

I just wanna, I just wanna know If you're gonna, if you're gonna stay.

I just gotta, I just gotta know I can't have it, I can't have it any other way.

I swear she's destined for the screen. Closest thing to Michelle Pfeiffer that you've ever seen, oh

Lady, running down to the riptide, Taken away to the dark side, I wanna be your left-hand man. I love you when you're singing that song, And I got a lump in my throat 'Cause you're gonna sing the words wrong.

Oh lady, running down to the riptide, Taken away to the dark side, I wanna be your left-hand man. I love you when you're singing that song, And I got a lump in my throat 'Cause you're gonna sing the words wrong.

Oh lady, running down to the riptide, Taken away to the dark side, I wanna be your left-hand man. I love you when you're singing that song, And I got a lump in my throat 'Cause you're gonna sing the words wrong.

Yeah, I got a lump in my throat 'Cause you're gonna sing the words wrong.”

The crowd was very interactive with him, singing along and afterwards, they were going crazy because they genuinely enjoyed his performance. He looked at you with a very happy expression that made your heart skip a beat. You smiled back at him, and he motioned for you to take the microphone while he took his place at the keyboard to help sing back-up for you. The judges also seemed to be enjoying themselves through Hitoshi’s song. You were still nervous, but you took a deep breath and started your song anyways.

“Ooh, ah Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Ooh, ah Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

I know we don't need anyone, anyone. Here in the dark, I feel my heart. And we react like chemicals, chemicals Here in the darkness, I feel my heart beat.

Oh, when we lock eyes, Come with me don't kill the vibe. Look around, no one's in sight Hold me down if I get too wild, I swear. You and I could just disappear. We can run away from here. To the darkest places, Too late, no one can save us now.

When you spill your guts they don't go back in. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) If I say too much it's my consequence. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) So take your razor love and run it down my skin. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) If I bleed too much it's my consequence. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)

Oh, your fingers locked in my hair, Our clothes all over the chair, We're all alone And I'm dancin' in my underwear. You laugh and I blush, and it hurts so much. You melt and I die, The world is ours At least it is tonight.

(It's chemical, it's chemical Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)

When you spill your guts they don't go back in. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) If I say too much it's my Consequence. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) So take your razor love and run it down my skin. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) If I bleed too much it's my Consequence. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)

Yeah we don’t need anyone, anyone. Here in the dark, I feel my heart. And we react like chemicals chemicals. Here in the darkness, I feel my heart beat.

When you spill your guts they don't go back in. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) If I say too much it's my consequence. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) So take your razor love and run it down my skin. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) If I bleed too much it's my consequence. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Ooh, ah Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Ooh, ah Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.”

You were met with more applause and singing along than you expected, and honestly you had a great time performing. You got the audience involved, your voice was spot on, everything went perfectly. And you were very happy with what you did. And it seemed like the judges were too. You both walked back to the theater, all pumped up as you sat next to your friends. Compliments were going all around, everyone telling each other how well they did. Now, you all had to wait to see if you made it through.

Everyone was called back in the order they had performed, and after seeing countless people come out with bad news and a few with good news, your nerves were back in full force. Unluckily for you and Hitoshi, you two were dead last. Again. So, you just had to sit there, and wait. And the worst part is, only half of the people who already got the news came out the way they went in to keep the remaining contestants clueless on if they made it through or not. Luckily, though, Mina, Denki, Sero, Kirishima, Bakugou, Uraraka, Midoriya, and Todoroki all made it through. You knew that much. And now, you and Hitoshi were the only ones waiting. 

A producer came out and you gave Hitoshi a thumbs up as he stood to go back. “Wait, the two of you are okay to head onto the stage together.”

You look at each other, a little confused, before you stand up and follow Hitoshi back to the stage where the two of you had performed earlier. “Oh, good, they sent you together,” you hear Midnight say as the two of you walk on the stage. Sure enough, there are two seats set up where the usual one is for whoever is being told good news, or bad news. “Yeah, this will make it much easier.”

“How are you two?” Toshinori asks, and you snort. “Very nervous.”

“I second that,” Hitoshi says, and the judges laugh. “Well, that’s good. When you’re nervous about something it means you care about it, so that’s a good answer,” Aizawa says, a small grin on his face. Weird. He never smiles. “So, do y’all think you made it through?” Hawks asks, and the two of you look at each other before Hitoshi shrugs. “We honestly don’t know.”

“Yeah, everyone did really well today. We can only hope we did.”

“Another good answer,” Aizawa says, and the two of you grin. Getting praise from Shouta Aizawa is a wonderful feeling. “Well, I suppose we can just rip the band aid off. You two have been waiting for quite some time,” Midnight says, and Toshinori nods. “So, as you know, only twenty people are able to advance to the next round.”

You both nod.

“And you both did very well today.”

You both say thank you.

“And so far, we’ve only accepted eighteen people in the top twenty.”

Your heart starts beating faster. 

“Which means there are two spots left.”

Hitoshi grabs your hand. 

“And those two spots, belong to you two. Congratulations, it’s up to the world to see how far you’ll progress in the competition now.”

───────────────────────────────────

Song list:

Kirishima | Locked Out of Heaven - Bruno Mars

Mina | Positions - Ariana Grande

Denki | No Control - One Direction

Midoriya | Dance Monkey - Tones and I

Uraraka | New Rules - Dua Lipa

Bakugou | Sugar, We’re Goin Down - Fall Out Boy

Sero | Caramelo - Ozuna

Todoroki | Willow - Taylor Swift

Shinsou | Riptide - Vance Joy

(Y/n) | My Consequence - Hey Violet

[twistednuns]

February 2020

I managed to use my iPad as a second monitor for my computer. So tech savvy. Yay me!

Joking about developing a sex-based cardio programme with Manu. Powerfucking! Might help against aggression as well.

A late night phone call with Tom. Not saying much.

Making a huge pot of my grandmother’s signature veggie stew.

More Bon Appétit test kitchen videos. Chris recreating tacos. Claire making Ben&Jerry’s. Priya making her mum’s Indian curries.

Writing a letter to Lena. Drawing upside down bats (which makes them look like they’re having a wicked dance-off). Just the act of writing. I thoroughly enjoy looking at my handwriting.

Using the Salted Coconut handscrub by Lush. Especially now that I wash my hands so often when we’re working with clay at school. I feel like the peeling triggers some pressure points on my palms.

That Saturday productivity high. Cooking and preparing heaps of stuff, cleaning the windows, doing laundry.

Painting my nails like an expressionist artist.

Some portrait studies. Accidentally drawing Sirius Black.

Being really motivated to improve my Spanish. Working with Lorena, the Duolingo app and even starting my own grammar/vocabulary book.

This ultra quirky ASMR video. Also: watching videos with Erin an her boyfriend Chris. It’s amazing how well they work together. How you can almost feel their connection, how similar they are.

Carrot cake oats.

Seeing the The Darkness live again, this time with Margit. Justin’s outfit and personality, singing along, especially to Time of my Life, the band’s traditional first song after the show.

Meeting Chris. Having a Bramblette cocktail at Pusser’s. I like that place. Feels very old-timey with a rowing boat right under the ceiling. We made out in front of a tiger slide in a toy store window on our way to the next bar.

Peeling fresh carrots.

Pickling onions and making kimchi. My fermentation game is strong these days!

Looking through Dominik’s sketchbook. I loved the tree whose bark resembled a mole burrow with its underground tunnel system.

The flu. Yes, really. Fewer pupils at school. Quiet times. I’m actually surprisingly healthy. I’d guess my probiotics must play a role here… Who knows.

More sourdough experiments. Writing about it (DELICACY - a haiku. Oven-warm sourdough / salted butter, alpine cheese / and a strawberry).

Finding a really interesting list of SanFran hippie era book recommendations at the end of Robin Sloan’s Ajax Penumbra: 1969. In the mood to read Maya Angelou, Tom Wolfe, Jack Kerouac, Richard Brautigan.

Even more beautiful books: I really enjoyed Die weiße Stadt by Karolina Ramqvist, a feminist author from Sweden, and the graphic novel version of To Kill a Mockingbird. But two books that literally (well, figuratively obviously) blew my mind were Circe by Madeline Miller (mythology, loneliness, animals and plants, magic and monsters, some desperate kind of feminism, independence and strength) and Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo (magical realms, university setting, psychological depth, unexpected twists and turns). I haven’t read anything comparable in a very long time and I desperately hope that there’s more to come from these authors.

A beach collecting all the world’s single socks in The Magicians. Oh and of course seeing them break the moon. What a sight. The show is super confusing, obnoxious and absolutely fabulous at the same time. Best example: the Freaky Friday szene in which Margo and Eliot switch bodies. I love how the actors took on each other’s speech patterns and behaviour.

A new addition to my colour vocabular: celadon (a greyish green; there is a type of ceramics you’ll only see in this colour which is not surprising since the shade provides such an interesting contrast to the the earthy, rusty orange of burnt clay.)

Manu telling me that he had rarely seen people with more joy in their eyes than me (“Ich habe schon Freude in deinen Augen gesehen! So ein Leuchten kann man nicht simulieren.”) after complaining about being bored and lifeless. / Making curry with or, well, for him the other night. Drinking Liqueur 43 with cinnamon and milk. Playing the Jackbox party games for which you can use your phone as a controller.

Finding myself in a well-known sitation from the past. Lying in Frank’s bed in the early morning hours, not that tired yet, when he starts talking about his life and his depression. In English, obviously, because that’s our emotional filter. Relating, since I feel quite similar. Coming up with a suggestion for a reciprocal support system. Let’s see what we can do for each other.

Looking at travel photographs. The sea, the cenotes. Longing to go back to Mexico or Australia. Diving. Taking it all in.

Dreaming of my grandmother talking about her biggest regrets in life. Weirdly she was in a little bundle under a coffee table, much like Voldemort in the last Harry Potter movie.

My weird, weird brain. How both pleasure and pain enhance my sense of smell and increase my brain activity, almost causing hallucinations and fixations on ideas. Like geometric shapes in gloomy off-colours and a beige silicon-like surface the other night. All I could think of was a benchscraper.

Blue eyeliner.

Brainstorming three-letter-words with Frank since I’m thinking of getting personalised Nike Blazers. Sad cat. Yes but. Dat ass. Why tho.

Flying squirrels. Watching them wobble through the air. How they look like cute exhibitionist when they’re extending their limbs and thus stretching their, well, let’s just call it wings.

The fact that red cabbage has an intricate pattern like brain convolutions when you cut it open.

Talking to Sonja for the first time in over two years. What a strange person. Interesting, too. At least in homeopathic doses.

Ripe strawberries and nectarines. Oh my god. I love fruit.

Meeting Eve at Pub Quiz. She identifies as female, loves swing dance, used to be an animator and I love her style. Also, I realised that really like Betty. And Dennis wasn’t mean to me for once. I love my nerd friends <3 And I learned that Starbucks was named after the first mate in Moby Dick! Also, coincidentally they asked a question about the city where To Kill a Mockingbird takes place (Maycombe, Alabama) after I had read it the week before.

Inviting Lorena to the Botanical Gardens. I always feel very happy and very much myself when I’m there. I sometimes wish I was a gardener. Lorena was late so I walked along the Spring Path outside and it might have been the first time I’ve seen a brussels sprouts plant. Inside I learned lots of Spanish words and marveled at the incredible butterflies. The huge yellow one right behind the entrance was my favourite. Its delicate feelers were fascinating.

Washing my hands at the Keg’s bathroom. Looking into the mirror. Suddenly thinking of the perfect karaoke song… Rescue Me by Bell Book and Candle! I kept singing it for days on repeat. My neighbour must hate me (nothing new here) especially since my voice is too low for the chorus.

It isn’t hard to see how such attachment patterns can undermine mental health. Both anxious and avoidant coping have been linked to a heightened risk of anxiety, depression, loneliness, eating and conduct disorders, alcohol dependence, substance abuse and hostility. The way to treat these problems, say attachment theorists, is in and through a new relationship. On this view, the good therapist becomes a temporary attachment figure, assuming the functions of a nurturing mother, repairing lost trust, restoring security, and instilling two of the key skills engendered by a normal childhood: the regulation of emotions and a healthy intimacy. // An interesting article on attachment styles and why theraphy works; it makes me want to learn more about attachment theory. This School of Life video is a nice addition as well.

That dream. About a book shop modeled after my picture of Penumbra’s 24-hour bookstore. There was an old man in a very narrow but high-ceilinged room full of books. There was no light source except for moonlight or some street lights. There were loads of stairs, very steep, leading to the back of the house. Upstairs the man would set out cat food and on the rooftop there was an old sailing boat. One day the man decided to open the door to the roof and let visitors see the ship, much like a museum; perhaps to attract customers. However, in the next night a cat-shaped ghost appeared who reminded me quite a lot of Kot Behemoth character in Mikhail Bulgakov’s The Master and Margarita. The ghost was not amused about the old man’s decision and took away his key, a big golden one adorned with a red ribbon.

Toasted sesame makes pretty much every dish so much better.

Watching High Fidelity with gorgeous Zoe Kravitz (I adore her effortless style and her outfits), getting in the mood for making a playlist and listening to more music in general. There are all these great songs out there I forgot about.

Remembering the xkcd storm chaser comics.

Making a wicked good batch of Pho for Tom.

Spending a nice evening with Alex at Shamrock. Singing along to American Boy by Estelle. Confirming the hypothesis that the nerdy, quiet ones usually have a freak streak. That moment in the morning. Eye contact and kegel exercises.

Karaoke with Margit and Betty. Meeting Manu’s doppelganger. Same type, looks, voice. Eerie.

Making a BA Gourmet Makes meme for Steffen after he had passed his law examps. Strangely Gaby kinda looked like him after I was done with it.

Saturday morning in bed. Reading comics and graphic novels. Fresh bedclothes, surrounded by books. Since it was February 29 I thought about leap years and asked a few friends what their inner seven-year-old would have done that day (based on the thought experiment that your birthday was on February 29 and you’d age in 4-year-steps which would divide your age by 4 obviously).      

I came up with: visiting grandma / eating Cini-Minis / falling asleep with my face buried in a cat / beating my neighbour Anna at Memory / drawing while listening to a Bibi Blocksberg cassette.

Alex said he’d have been outside all day, building a snow igloo. Not noticing his mum telling him to come to dinner. If the weather had been bad he would have played with his dinosaur collection. His inner 7-year-old was a hopeless dreamer who got agitated whenever his parents had a fight. Who came home late from school every day because he forgot about time when he was talking to his friend next to a hedge with thorns that looked like tiny airplanes.

Lena said she would have been outside all day long, playing in the mud with the neighbours’ kids. Of course.

[i-amusemyself]

All Emoji Asks.

🐰 what is one secret youve never told anyone?I don't really have that many secrets. I guess theres a side of my personality that I spend a lot of energy supressing like hell that I hate with a passion.💗 if you could hug anyone, who would it be?Right now? My best friend right next to me or my friend back home.🐹 what are some of your favourite pokemons and why?I mean, I only ever played pokemon go, but from that I loved the squirtles and the evees just bc theyre cute af🌠 if you were in charge of the world what would it be like?A lot more chilled out. Chill pills would be mandatory.👀 what was the most recent vivid dream you had?Okay I had two freaking weird ones the other night?In one I was a 10 y/o muslim girl going to a new primary school and while I was there I started raising money for a cancer charity.In the other I was taking a really hard A level maths exam and getting stressed and mad bc everyone kept talking and I couldnt finish it in time.☀ what do you like most about your best friend?EVERYTHING?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Idk, I guess how forgiving and layed back she is. She always tries to understand and see things from your point of view.😘 talk about your crush or partnerLmao I'm alone 😂 I do have a crush but its a million miles from mutual so like, shes amazing but boi it hurts 😂💁 if someone was rude to you would you be rude back?Depends on how well I know them and what they're like tbh. I'll banter, but I avoid confrontation.🌟 what do you like about yourself? (3 things)😂😂😂 wow erm...1. I always try and put in all the energy I have if someone/something needs it2. I make loads of terrible puns its gr93. I really dont have any other qualities idk🐾 what are you scared of most? How will you overcome it?👏 I'm terrified of abandonment 👏 aaaand as of yet I have no idea how to deal with it ngl🎁 what never fails to make you happy?Really good stand up commedy or my favourite music💙 what annoys you about some people?Their complete lack of self-awareness. Idk, maybe I'm low key jealous too but srsly some people????😤 do you get angry easily?Yeah. I keep pretty good tabs on it so you probs wouldnt know it, but if something upsets me, chances are I'm hella pissed too.🐇 what do you always daydream about?Dramatic and upsetting situations or drunk situations 😂🌻 if you could change 3 things about the world what would you change?1. Sort out equality and all that jazz2. Divide up the land more equally, bc it pisses me off that some people are living in tiny cramped shacks and others have 100 mile square farms.3. End capitalism and with that make all necessary services free.🍓 send me 4 names: kiss, befriend, kill or marry?Anon?✈ what is your dream city and why?I mean Ive always wanted to go to copenhagen but theres no guarantee its gonna be my fave. My fave so far is Amsterdam bc its so peaceful and the architecture is to die for.☕ talk about your ideal day?Spend it with my best friend/crush. Lay in bed late and be lazy and watch good TV/movies. Maybe go out in the afternoon to not go stir crazy and entertain ourselves. Stay up kinda late talking about deep shit, lying underneath the stars.🌸 are you an introvert, ambivert or extrovert?Ambivert!💧 when was the last time you cried?Yesterday lmao 😂 i havent gone more than 2 days without crying in the past week 😧 I just got myself into a nice Depression Episode.🎵 name 5 songs you like atm?Argh I havent listened to music in so long (7 days...) umm so things i wanna listen to- youth by daughter- voices by Motionless in white- living dead girl by rob zombie- corpse roads by keaton hensen- lost boy by troye sivan⚡ if you had any superpower what would it be and why?Mind reading bc my anxiety would be halved.💛 if you could talk to your younger self, what would you say?I'd tell myself to stop trying to fit in and be like everybody else because the people I know are just a tiny portion of the population and really aren't much to aspire to. I'd tell myself to drop all my shitty friends because it would stop me from dealing with a lot of crap later on. I'd point myself in the right direction of the better people 😂I'd teach myself how to stand up for myself and how to not take any crap.And I'd give myself a hug and tell myself it's okay not to be cishet, because maybe if I could turn back time and start to deal with it earlier I'd be okay with it now.💚 who are you jealous of and why?A lot of people really, with qualities I don't have.I suppose one kid in particular is like, everything i want to be. Kind, hillarious, confident, close to people I love. 💎 what would you rather have more of: intelligence, beauty, kindness, wealth or bravery? Why?Bravery or kindness?? Its hard to have one without the other. Also beauty ngl bc im fugly.🙊 what are you ashamed of?My gender and sexuality 👏🌺 which languages do you know? Which do you want to learn?I know english and spanish and I'm learning Danish. Hopefully once I'm okay at danish I can learn arabic. Ill be satisfied after that 😂☘ if you could be any fictional characters friend/lover who would it be and why?I mean, theres plenty of fictional lesbians where im like 😏👀 but honestly if I had to pick only one person I'd choose Kieren Walker from in the flesh bc he needs a friend and I relate to him so strongly.☁ talk about your dream universe.Mental and physical illness doesnt exist. People arent dicks. Everything is free. No one feels unloveable.💜 which acts of kindness are you going to do today?Idk I'm p much done for the day 😂 I've been helping out around the house all day tho🐬 if you could transform into any animal what would it be and why?I mean i might be biased but either a dog or a sloth bc they get to sleep all the time 😂🍄 talk about someone/something you really dislike.Someone I was best friends with for 4 years suddenly turned around and stabbed me in the back, made up shit about me, arranged that all my friends not talk to me for a fortnight, sent group emails stuffed with emotional manipulation and blamed me for her suicidal thoughts. I nearly ended it. Now I get to watch my friends still loving her like she isn't the world's most heartless person. It makes my blood boil.😣 talk about something that has been making you depressed/angry/anxious.I'm staying with my best friend rn and I can't stand the thought of going home.🍪 what did you want to be as a kid and what do you want to be now?I wanted to be a nurse and now I wanna be a doctor 👏 variety 👏🍰 what are some of your favourite sugary foods?I cant really eat sugar 😂 so fuck knows? Chocolate?🍑 what are you obsessed with?Brains, thought processes, psychopaths, graveyards and more 😂💘 what happens to you when youre stressed?I just get really emotional and start agressively making lists everywhere in an attempt to sort my life out.😪 what are you sick of?Humanity.🙀 are you an adrenaline seeker?Yeah its terrible 😂 i hate anxiety but I also kinda love it when my heart races.💥 what are some unpopular opinions you have?I....dont? I cba with discourse lifes too short.☔ would you consider yourself a good person?I think anyone with good intentions is usually a good person so yeah😊 what do you do as hobbies?Sleep, binge watch netflix and blog 😂🎤 whats the last song you hummed or sang by yourself?👏👏👏 Mr Brightside 👏👏👏 what a jam 👏👏👏🐝 whats your worst trait?Being waaayyy too clingy.🌷 whats your mbti personality type and why do you think it suits you?ISFJ and yeah defo, its the defender and I feel that tbh🐶 send me 3 fictional people and ill choose my favourite.Anon?👑 who are your favourite celebrities and why?Kaitlyn Alexander is my bae.Besides that I dont really....obsess over any celebrities? Eliza taylor is doing p good 😂 ummm also some youtubers? Do they count?🐴 opinion on __?Its a great bit of punctuation.🍋 do you consider yourself to be an emotional person?Lmfaoooooo YES📚 share 3 books you love and your favourite quotes from them.M8. Thats not gonna happen 😂 I love any book that makes me cry but I cannot quote a single word.😔 what do you always do when you feel sad? Does it work?Find a quiet corner, shut my eyes and listen to my Depression Playlist. It doesn't always make me feel better but it helps me ride it out.🙂 what thoughts keep you going when you're sad?The thoughts of uni and that I'll hopefully meet some great new people. Also my best friend. Just in general 😂🌎 which country do you live in?England.🐧 describe yourself in 3 words?Awkward, tall and shy.🙉 what quotes changed you?"Pick your fights" bc as much as its a meme it helps me chill outAlso "everything is temporary" and "the sun will rise and we will try again".💭 do you keep a diary?I have a personal blog which acts as a diary yeah💫 who inspires you?Kaitlyn Alexander!! (Listen theyre like the first nb representation I ever knew and I relate so much to everything they say and theyre so cute and talented)👻 do you believe in ghosts and why?I mean, my initial response is no. Because we're just bags of flesh made up of cells and when we die those cells die so theres nothing to live on.But tbh we know so little about the universe I'm open to the possibility of anything at this point.🎀 whats your fashion sense like?Dior. I know what clothes I like and think look good but I never like them on me.🎬 what are some of your favourite films?Deadpool, My sisters keeper, pitch perfect 2 ermm🍦 what is one treasured childhood memory?UmmmmmmmmmmmmWhen I first got my bunny, that was an amazing day!!🐼 if you could meet anyone, who would it be and why?Um my soulmate? Where are they at?

[michaelgeorgehanlon]

divide: an album review.

haven’t used this in like four years but i really felt the need to share my thoughts on ed sheeran’s new record because it’s fucking amazing. so here’s my track by track review of divide.

eraser - such a banger of an album opener. i feel like his first two albums lacked a strong opening track (as in something somewhat explosive and not as mellow; with no disrespect to the a team or one). reminds me a lot of runaway on his previous album.

castle on the hill - i’ve honestly been listening to this song almost nonstop for two months since it was released as one of the first two singles. it’s just so great. so much happiness and nostalgia and i’m pretty sure i’m not the only one who sings this at the top of my lungs while driving. and “had my first kiss on a friday night, i don’t reckon i did it right” is such a great line.

dive - i’m such a sucker for songs in 6/8 time. also i’m sure the lyrics are relatable for a lot of us. really hits home pretty hard. not to mention the guitar solo is super bitchin.

shape of you - another banger and it obviously had to be a single. it’s crazy how it sounds so different from his other stuff but still feels super ed sheeran-like.

perfect - definitely my favorite track on the album. his simpy, cute songs are seriously my favorites. this song is literally amazing. the strings gives me so many chills and feels. like i’m actually kind of bitter that i’m too old to slow dance to this at my high school prom but too young to make this my wedding song HAHA. i have a hunch it’ll be the third or fourth single and a massive radio hit. it’s loaded with so many tweetable lines and adorable potential instagram captions for couples. “now i know i have met an angel in person” is seriously the sweetest fucking line of all time.

galway girl - the fiddle is so bad ass on this song. anyone else feel like going to a pub and drinking a pint or two of guinness with me while listening to this?

happier - it was about time for a super slow acoustic song and another relatable as hell track for all of us.

new man - UGH i love everything about the direction he went for in this song lyrically, describing how much of a clown this “new man” is. “tribal tattoos and he don’t know what it means” is so great. i hate him too, ed. this would also make a great single somewhere down the line.

hearts don’t break around here - i can totally hear this song in a romantic comedy. so great.

what do i know? - sounds a lot like love yourself by justin bieber but i’ll look past that. really catchy though.

how would you feel (paen) - easily one of my top five favorite songs on the album. and god bless john mayer’s guitar solo. it fits the mood of the song so well. HONESTLY ED SHEERAN MAKES ME FEEL GUILTY FOR NOT BEING IN LOVE AS IF BEING SINGLE IS A BAD THING.

supermarket flowers - probably one of his best songs ever but to avoid crying every single time unfortunately i’m going to listen to this as little as possible. too many feels, man.

bonus tracks:

barcelona - this one just makes me want to keep dancing until my kneecaps shatter or something. and hearing an englishman sing in spanish a little is the fucking best. my favorite line is definitely “i want you baby, solamente.” man i need to get myself a latina.

bibia be ye ye - [continues to dance until my entire body goes numb]

nancy mulligan - [drinks more guinness]

save myself - to be honest this is probably my least favorite song on the album but it’s still pretty damn good so that sums up how amazing the whole thing is, right?

so yeah, there you have it. i’m almost certainly going to only listen to divide for the next several days/weeks.

and now let’s all continue to wait (im)patiently for him to announce his goddamn US tour dates already.